Youve seen this sign, especially in restaurants:

We Reserve The Right To Refuse Service To Anyone!

In the restaurant world, a patron who is banned for life is said to have been 86d. I have no idea where this came from, but it means dont you dare step foot in that eatery again!

I learned it as a worldly-wise busboy, 15 years of age.

But I dont think Ive ever seen someone else being 86d, but the other day it happened to me.

I asked a video place to transfer a European video I had, with a non VHS format, to DVD. They did itsort of. It couldn't play on my TVs, so I asked them to try again, or give me a refund.

The proprietor flipped out, saying I had an obsolete machine, but heck, its a two year old Sony, so he was wrong. Anyway, we settled on the idea of him putting it on VHS, instead, and he said a condition of doing so is that I never darken his doorstep, again.

With glee, I agreed! No problem, I thought.

Anyway, I was 86d.

Which brings up this question: should we be able to get along with everybody, or are there acceptable levels of interpersonal communication failure that we simply must tolerate?

I made a sales presentation the other day, and from the minute I said hello, I felt one guy was simply gunning for me, waiting for a chance to torpedo my proposal. Call it bad vibes, intuition, a gut feeling, bad karma, messed up chemistrywhateverwe did not hit it off.

I blame myself, because I want to get along with everybody, but again, is it possible, or just too darned perfectionistic?

In other words, can we, should we, or must we all 86 certain prospects?

I want to say, no, we shouldnt. Its a bad practice, and certainly a self-defeating practice.

I look at it this way. If car dealers, who by tradition and perhaps temperament, are hagglers over pricing, should they pity themselves because their prospects gun for them, seeking bargains, and perceiving them as liars, and crooks?

If car dealers insisted on being loved by everybody, while rejecting those who were treating them obnoxiously, theyd go broke in less than a month!

So, why should anyone else, like me, be less thick-skinned?

I dont have an answer to that, except to say, hey thats business.

Toughen up, or hang it up!