The bride was radiant, the groom sober, the father of the bride managing to look prosperous, and the children under five uniformly cheerful. In short, a perfect wedding. But as the bride and groom inclined their faces towards each other in that momentous ritual of a first kiss as husband and wife, there were those hateful words from some one pretending to be whispering, That whole ceremony must have taken all of five minutes!

How crass! Putting a time element on such a highly charged emotional experience as a wedding.

Do you hear anyone complaining that a sonnet has only fourteen lines, and how more perfect it would be if had three hundred and sixty five lines?

And how about those Parliamentary question sessions? Does anyone ever manage to stay awake long enough to find out what the question was, let alone complain about the shortness of the answer?

So what is it about the shortness of a wedding ceremony that so many people take exception to? Is it something to do with the perceived value for money? And those present feel short-changed because the ceremony finished too soon?

Is it really the fault of the couple, or is it more likely that while the ceremony was in progress the complaining guests were checking their text messages, waving at friends across the aisle, comparing the standard of dress worn by the grooms side of the family as opposed to those worn by the brides?

One thing for certain, their mind wasnt on the ceremony if the only thing they remember about it is its length.

Who can ever forget Churchills awesome rhetoric, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.

Thirty-five words in all. Thirty-five words that have been for ever inscribed in the pages of history. Thirty-five words in all. Yet who can ever forget them?

Ah, but had you the misfortune of attending the Parliament house and listened not to those thirty-five heart-wrenching words, but to the whole 3,768 words which comprised the total speech, would you still feel the same? Or would you be inclined to agree with the Opposition that old Winnie was getting too big for his breeches, and didn't he just love to hear his own voice!